While none of us choose to fall out of love, many of us are unaware of the defenses we’ve formed and adaptations we’ve made that may now limit us in our ability to stay close and connected to our partner. Giving and receiving love actually challenges our core defenses, early adaptations we formed to protect ourselves against the ways we were hurt.” “Early experiences of feeling hurt or rejected can injure our ability to connect with and sustain our loving feelings. Lisa Firestone, co-author of Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships. “Almost every one of us struggles, to some degree, to stay connected to our loving feelings,” said Dr. “finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away.” Lasting love is possible, but it isn’t always easy.
After conducting a 75-year longitudinal study from Harvard University, researcher George Vaillant and his team concluded that the keys to happiness were 1. There are many reasons relationships change for the worse, but what’s perhaps most valuable to consider is our own struggles surrounding love and intimacy.